Once upon a time, perfume was a little life-luxury that we dabbed on our necks or knees before meeting the Queen, or as we were preparing to go to Ralph and Trudy’s for their annual New Year’s Eve party. We even dabbed a little bit extra before a date with Lenny, and we swooned if he noticed because it took a long time to save up for that pretty bottle right? There was just one. The one. Maybe as we got older or the world changed, we changed in our tastes, and we ventured on to number 2 (and for so many that was No 5).
Nonetheless, we knew what we liked and we went for that, and it always delivered pleasure and comfort and a sense of specialness whenever we went to a dab-worthy event. End of story….?
Nowadays (can you hear my bones creaking?) apparently we need Style Messiahs to shape us and educate us as to what’s hip. We need such a lot of help and advice just to recognise what’s on point, on trend, on fleek and how to put it on straight. Thankfully Youtube is teeming with them. How would we even survive without hot-goss-gurus? Where would we be without the daily glam guidance of our wardrobe wardens, our vanity vlogstars?
Megaphones ever-ready, the self-appointed fabulistas do their darndest to make sure we are buying whatever the hell they are shoving down our throats. Are we just too busy to self-style? Are we really so unstylish? Are we too feeble now to trust our own ears, eyes, noses, hands and tongues?
‘Buy this, you’ll love it’… I love it, so you’ll buy it. Smiling Emoji Kissing Emoji etc
‘Don’t buy that, you’ll hate it.’ I don’t like it, so never ever buy it. Scowling Emoji etc
Influence, apparently is real power. I even heard that Dale Carnegie’s escaped his crypt. He’s back in town, brasher than ever, doing the circuit just to (re)prove that Winning Friends and Influencing People is still where it’s at.
So, what do all these sellerbrities get for their influential troubles? Free stuff? Sponsorship? Supa-Selfies? Money to stay home and apply all the free stuff while they drone on about it in front of their e-minions? Cushy jobs like POTUS?
What are they creating? Making? Solving? Fixing? Producing? Contributing to the world? White noise and anonymous followers. Hit the like button here ->
So, you may well ask, why am I blogging about it? That’s a bit hypocritical. Well, I’m blogging about it because I’m an artist and all my products are made by me, and… I just like to subvert bullies, and encourage free-thinking in the world. Imagination is sovereign in my world. I’m also writing this to say I deeply care about the integrity of people who think for themselves. I want to be your friend enough that I will get on a plane and fly to visit you and eat my lunch with you, and ask your advice a lot of the time, because I love the way you think. We can influence each other with open, curious minds and mutual respect.
And please say hi to Ralph and Trudy next December, I expect the Queen probably won’t remember me, it was a long time ago, but she did ask me what perfume I was wearing.
‘Oh it’s just something I whipped up at home.’
still from Aquarium 2007. Me listening to my own advice.